Thursday, October 13, 2011

My take on birth control

The POH topic for October is birth control. I want to start off by saying that I know this can be a hot topic among believers and my post is not meant to stir up a lot of the rights and wrongs of birth control. I'm simply going to tell you where our family is on this issue right now and why.

When I first got married, I decided to use a hormonal pill form of birth control that was "only" supposed to keep me from ovulating each month. I researched it as much as I knew how to ensure that it would in no way cause a miscarriage/ abortion if I somehow managed to get pregnant, and then I started taking it about a month before my wedding day to make certain that I did not suffer any major side effects from it. Before I started taking the pill, my cycle was completely normal and regular with the obvious signs of ovulation. When we stopped taking the pill to try to get pregnant 1.5 years later, my cycle never went back to normal. My cycles were totally random and I was not ovulating very often, if at all. We struggled with infertility for a deeply painful, emotional, roller coaster year (I blogged about it at POH HERE) and were finally able to conceive with the help of Clomid, a drug that helps you ovulate.

Because of that struggle, I will never, ever take any form of hormonal birth control again. I am fully convinced that the pill disrupted the natural, God-given rhythm of my body. I know that birth control does not affect everyone in this way and I have friends who went off the pill and got pregnant the very next month, and even some who have gotten pregnant while on the pill. But it definitely affected me adversely and I am not taking any chances and will never take any form of birth control again. In addition, the hormonal form of birth control did cause me headaches, mood swings, and a lowered immune system. I am a much healthier person for being off the pill and I will never use it again.

So where does that leave us? After we struggled with infertility, my husband and I decided not to use any form of birth control at all for the time being. We were hoping for several children and did not want to miss any chances! Thankfully, we did not struggle with infertility again after the first baby. Because of breastfeeding, my cycle did not usually return again for almost a year, but each time we quickly got pregnant again after it returned.

How long will we continue to use no form of birth control? I honestly do not know. We are just going to continue doing what we are doing until God shows us it is time to stop. How will we know if/when it is time to stop getting pregnant? This is something I have thought about a lot and I simply have faith in God to make it clear to us. He has clearly guided us through every big decision we have made and I trust Him to do the same in this matter. I have already been praying that God will prepare my heart when it is time because I absolutely love having babies and it will be very difficult for me emotionally when it is time to stop. But when God does show us that it is time, we will simply use the natural fertility awareness method as described in the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility.

I do wonder if my physical condition will be the way God chooses to show us that it is time to stop... each pregnancy has seemed to double in difficulty and I have a few issues that grow worse and more serious with every pregnancy. It could be that the next pregnancy (if God allows another) will be my last because of those issues. I am trying to prepare myself for such a possibility.

Regardless of when my child-bearing days are over, we plan to adopt at some point and are praying for God's timing in that matter. I would love to adopt babies around the same age as my own so that they could grow up together. But we also like the idea of waiting until our girls are older (teenagers) and could really help and learn about caring for a newborn. One of the pastors at the church we previously attended adopted a baby when his daughters were in high school and their love and care for the baby was such a beautiful thing. And even with the big age difference, they are such good friends today. So we are definitely praying about when God would like us to adopt. Until then, I am just ever so grateful that God has blessed me with these sweet girls

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